I had one of the mellow, mind-blowing conversations with my son the other day… the kind of conversations that typically only happen when I am alone with one child and usually driving. I think it must be the fluidity of the moment that helps unearth these jewels that are otherwise locked inside. That and perhaps when I am focused on the road, I tend to spew less judgment.
Anyway, my son was talking about LOVE. (I don’t even remember how it came up.) He said that sometimes he loved us so much he could burst. I said, “Oh when is that?” He said, “Oh it is those times when neither you or Daddy are yelling at us. When neither of you are out of sorts about one thing or another and you aren’t bugging us about anything digital.”
“Oh, I said.”
His comment took my breath away.
Scanning our days and existence, I quickly registered how few and far between those lovely LOVE moments actually were. Yet he remembered them. He held on to them. And he gave me hope.
Imagine if I could make space for more of them?
So you may be asking what does this parenting story have to do with coaching?
I can’t predict what will resonate for you, but some things that stood out for me are:
- a true connection can come from anywhere and at any time when we have an open mindset
- an open mindset is another way of saying that one’s judgment and defenses are not activated
- slowing down and being truly curious about another person's experience can help create an open mindset
- when we are able to “hear” what another person says, we have the ability to take in new information and perhaps make a different or more conscious choice (like hopefully I will remember to do with my sons)
- for me, movement supports a more open mindset.
I invite you to pay attention to the moments when you feel you have an open mindset and are able to have a dialogue with someone without becoming defensive or judgmental. It may be often. It may be rarely. It may be when you are moving.
Thank you dear son!